One More Reason to Quit Smoking: You'll Make New Friends, Study Finds

And, over several years, quitters were more likely to start new friendships with nonsmokers, the research found.

"I wouldn't say it's a surprise, but it's a welcome finding. It's good to have it documented by a study that quitting smoking will broaden your social circles," said Dr. Norman Edelman, senior medical consultant at the American Lung Association. He was not involved with the research, but reviewed its findings.

The study also confirmed what has been seen in previous research: People trying to quit who spend less time around smokers have the highest success rates over time.

The number of smokers in the United States has been declining for decades and is now at an all-time low, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. But about 17 percent of the American population still smokes, the CDC says.

That number is still too high, said one of the study's authors, Megan Piper. She's an associate director of research at the University of Wisconsin Center for Tobacco Research.

Piper said that people who want to quit smoking may fear that they will lose friends who continue to smoke.

"Smokers are afraid of losing their friends" to the nonsmoking world, Piper said, adding that until now, no one has really studied what happens to relationships when people quit smoking.

What is known, she said, is that people who quit tend to break off relationships with people who continue to smoke. The reasons they do this still need to be studied further, Piper said.

The initial study group included slightly more than 1,500 people participating in a smoking cessation program. They were from Milwaukee or Madison, Wis. All smoked at least 10 cigarettes per day.

They were randomly selected to receive medication, nicotine replacement products or a placebo. All were also given counseling to help them quit.

Nearly 700 smokers completed all of the study assessments. These occurred at the start of the study and then at one, two and three years after their target quit date. The average age of the study participants was 46 years, and about 60 percent were female.

During the three-year study period, nearly three-quarters of the study volunteers reported adding at least two new friends to their social circle.

People who quit found that they become more socially acceptable to a much wider group of people—nonsmokers, Piper said.

It doesn't happen immediately, though. "There is a vacuum for a while when people quit, and they tend to fill it" with other people and organizations, she explained.

Smokers who quit have more opportunities to spend time at smoke-free places, such as restaurants, bars, clubs and stores.

"In many social circles, it is totally unacceptable to smoke," Piper said. "We think it would be helpful for smokers who want to quit to think of this."

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Is Oral Sex Bad for Your Vagina?

Eighty-five percent of women have been on the receiving end of oral sex, according to a national study released over the summer. (That's equal to the number of guys who have received oral sex as well.) Based on the study results, it stands to reason that oral pleasure is a standard part of most couples' sexual repertoire.

But even though the practice is so widespread, there's not a lot of clear information out there about the potential health risks if you're getting, not giving. Safe sex guidelines tend to focus on vaginal and anal intercourse. That made us wonder: Does receiving oral sex pose any threat to the health of your vagina?

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“Oral sex isn’t necessarily bad for your vagina,” says Alyssa Dweck, MD, a New York-based ob-gyn and co-author of The Complete A to Z for Your V ($20, amazon.com). “There’s a natural environment of bacteria in the mouth and a natural environment of bacteria in the vagina, and for people with normal, healthy immune systems, there shouldn’t be an issue,” she tells Health.

While your partner's saliva is probably safe, his mouth, lips, and throat may not be. If he has a cold sore or feels one coming on—and his lips make contact with the skin on and around your vagina—he may pass it on to you. Cold sores are caused by the herpes virus, so his oral herpes can turn into genital herpes for you. “A lot of people don’t think about the fact that if a partner has one of these and then performs oral sex on a woman, she has the potential of developing a genital herpes infection,” explains Dr. Dweck.

Herpes isn't the only STD a woman can pick up after being orally pleasured. Gonorrhea and chlamydia can be passed on if your partner is infected with either of these bacterial STDs in his throat. HIV is another threat. Should an HIV-positive partner go down on you, viral particles could enter your bloodstream through an abrasion or sore in your vagina and pass HIV to you, says Dr. Dweck.  

Then there's the risk of contracting HPV, or the human papillomavirus. While the likelihood of transmission from oral sex isn't known, according to the Centers for Disease Control, some studies suggest that this is possible. If your partner has HPV in his throat and he carries one of the viral types linked to cervical cancer, he may pass the virus on to you and increase your risk of cervical cancer.

And just for good measure, partners on the receiving end can also end up transmitting an STD or other infection. “On the flip side, say a woman has her period and her partner is performing oral sex on her when there’s blood there,” says Dr. Dweck. “That’s not a wise idea because again, an infection could be transmitted via blood or bodily fluid contact.”

So if getting oral sex is something you enjoy, you can never be too cautious. “We usually recommend universal precautions for oral and genital sex,” says Dr. Dweck. If you don't know your partner's STD status, she encourages wearing a condom during intercourse. During oral sex, cover your vagina with a dental dam—a thin piece of latex placed over the vulva. This way, your partner's tongue and mouth can't make direct skin contact with your vaginal area.  

“People usually look at me like I have three heads when I say this, but something like a dental dam provides a very thin but safe barrier between the oral and vaginal cavities,” explains Dr. Dweck. It's not exactly sexy, we get it. But better safe than sorry, right?

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Can Your Vagina Be Too Tight for You to Enjoy Sex? A Gynecologist Explains

You’ve probably heard a woman worry aloud about how her vagina will be “too stretched out” or “will never be the same” after having a baby. But some women also wonder if they have the opposite problem: that they have a vagina that’s too tight and unable to accommodate a large or even average-size penis—leading to discomfort and pain during sex that can make intercourse almost impossible.

In general, that’s largely a myth. Fact is, your vagina is very stretchable. “Any vagina has the capacity to have elasticity. After all, a baby’s head comes through there,” says Lauren Streicher, MD, medical director of the Center for Sexual Medicine and Menopause at Northwestern Memorial Hospital in Chicago.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that the pain you might feel during sex isn’t real. If you don’t think that his penis is a match for your vagina because he can’t enter you at all or in full, and it hurts to try, an underlying issue might be going on. “If you’re having pain with intercourse, the causes are entirely fixable,” says Dr. Streicher.

Rather than assuming your vagina is too tight and there's nothing you can do, it's time to address what could really be keeping you in pain—instead of experiencing pleasure. Here are four causes to consider.

Is it hormonal?

Thanks to normal hormonal changes during perimenopause and menopause, vaginal tissue can thin out and get parched, making sex extremely uncomfortable. More surprisingly, the same problem can crop up in your 20s and 30s due to hormonal birth control, says Dr. Streicher. “While most women taking birth control pills will be fine, a small subset of women will develop thin dry vaginal tissue. Their doctor may tell them that they’re young and nothing is wrong with them, but they what they experience is excruciatingly painful,” she explains.

If you suspect your pain stems from a hormonal issue, tell your ob-gyn what you're experiencing and have her investigate. Fixing the problem could mean going on a different type of hormonal birth control or relying on a vaginal estrogen cream to rebuild elasticity in vaginal tissue.

Is it lubrication?

So many things can leave a woman high and dry during sex, and dryness is a major cause of pain during penetration. Maybe you’re taking a lot of antihistamines; these allergy meds can dry you out down below, too. It could be that you and your guy aren’t allowing for enough foreplay, and you just need a little more kissing and touching for things to start flowing down there. Dedicate more time to the warm up before the main event, and if foreplay isn't the issue, use lube. Super-slippery silicone lubricants are best, recommends Dr. Streicher.

Is it muscular?

In the past, if sex has been painful, your vagina may be conditioned to react by clamping down during penetration. Your brain says, nope, I don’t want to feel that again. “A lot of times, it’s the fear factor,” says Dr. Streicher. She often recommends that women take the penis out of the equation completely and practice with a dildo. “That can help you figure out if it’s the guy, the size, or you,” she says.

Is it a physical issue?

It’s rarer, but the pain could be the result of a physical problem. One woman Dr. Streicher treated "couldn’t have intercourse with her husband, and she was actually told by her doctor that his penis was too big. She had an undetected vaginal septum that had to be removed. She’s now fine,” she explains. (A vaginal septum is a wall of tissue inside the vagina.) This is why pain during sex that doesn’t get better with extra lube or foreplay needs to be evaluated by a doctor.What should you do?

Your first step is to decode what may be causing the pain (check!). Then, see an expert, like a gynecologist specializing in sexual medicine. In major cities you can often find pelvic-floor physical therapists as well, recommends Dr. Streicher; these professionals can be especially helpful if you have a muscular issue. Otherwise, her book SexRx outlines many at-home solutions that are worth giving a shot, from lubricants to dildos. A healthy, satisfying sex life is within reach of all women.

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Reasons Guys Should Do Kegels (Including Better Sex for Both of You)

If a woman visits her ob-gyn because of urinary problems or a sexual issue relating to arousal or orgasm, her doctor might advise her to start a regimen of kegel exercises. These moves strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, which can lose tone due to age or pregnancy. Stronger pelvic floor muscles lead to better bladder control and more sensation during sex.

But it isn't just women who can benefit from doing kegels; men can gain advantages as well. “Both men and women have these muscles,” says James Dupree, MD, an assistant professor of urology at Michigan Medicine. “A kegel exercise is the name given to any exercise strengthening the pelvic floor muscles. For guys, those are the muscles supporting organs like the penis, prostate, and rectum.”

Curious as to how they can help your partner—especially the way they can have an impact on your sex life? Here's what you need to know.

Kegels can help him stay harder during sex

Kegel exercises strengthen the shelf of muscle supporting the penis. Stronger muscles in this area can mean improved blood flow when your partner gets an erection—similar to the way working out any muscle gives circulation to nearby organs a boost. The result: stronger erections. While it's normal for a guy to occasionally experience erection issues, if he has regular trouble getting and staying hard, it can have an impact on your sex life, says Dr. Dupree. 

They can prevent premature ejaculation

These small-but-powerful moves can also give men more control over ejaculation, helping the pelvic floor muscles lengthen and contract appropriately. That helps him last longer in the bedroom. Dr. Dupree points to a small 2014 study, which showed that pelvic floor strengthening helped 82% of study participants (age 19 to 46) improve their premature ejaculation issues.

RELATED: What the Hell Is Dead Vagina Syndrome, and Do You Have It?

Kegels boost bladder and bowel control

For men, kegel exercises can also help improve bowel control (jokes asides, it's not the kind of leakage anyone wants to deal with). They can also make it less likely he'll experience stress incontinence, or accidentally dribble a little urine while pumping iron at the gym or on a run, for example. Strengthening those muscles is especially useful if, for instance, your guy “laughs, sneezes or lifts a heavy box” and he’s leaking a little pee in the process, says Dr. Dupree.

How can guy do kegels?

Pretty much the same way women do them. First, he has to find those pelvic floor muscles. “When a man is standing to urinate, those are the muscles he’d use to abruptly stop mid-stream,” says Dr. Dupree. “On a separate note, you can think of tightening the muscles you’d use to hold in gas.”

Once he's identified the right muscle group, Dr. Dupree advises that he “hold for three seconds, relax for three seconds.” Do this 10 times in a row, twice a day. “You can do them anywhere, really,” he says. “Sitting at a desk, in the bathroom. It should only take a few minutes.”

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Before he starts, a word of caution

Prior to your partner embarking on a kegel exercise routine, Dr. Dupree says he should first talk to his doctor about any potential underlying medical problems that might be behind his symptoms. For instance, it’s normal to have drip a tiny bit of pee after emptying the bladder; it’s not normal to be leaking urine between trips to the restroom. “For urinary issues, we’d want to check for UTIs or neurologic problems,” he explains.

If you’re dealing with problems in the bedroom, your guy should also bring that up with his physician before jumping right into kegels. “For erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation, it’s an issue that can be an early sign of what could eventually become heart disease, so we’d want to check out things like cholesterol,” Dr. Dupree says.

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5 Things You Need to Know Before You Try Anal Sex

How many women are having anal sex? According to one 2017 survey of millennials, 35% of sexually active women do it "at least some of the time." That lines up with a Centers for Disease Control report, which shows that 36% of women have done it at least once. 

But whatever the number is, one thing's for sure: Once-taboo anal sex is edging into the mainstream among heterosexual couples. Unlike penis-in-vagina sex, anal sex inspires lots of fear-mongering and myths. Hey, we're not here to judge. But we do want to clear up the confusion if you're thinking of giving it a try. Here are five things to consider.

It might hurt, so go slow

While the vagina is elastic and accommodating, the anus and rectum have thinner skin and don't share that same flexibility. If you’re interested in trying anal play, a good way to get acclimated and avoid pain is by first inserting a finger or using a butt plug, advises Nebraska-based certified sex therapist Kristen Lilla. When you feel comfortable enough to move on to your partner's penis, start off slowly, and make sure you communicate how you feel and if he needs to put on the brakes.

Staying calm is key; the more relaxed your body is, the less clenched your muscles will be. “Women (and men) may experience discomfort the first time they have anal sex, but this is often related to not being relaxed,” says Lilla  “Breathe so you can relax your pelvic floor and any tension you might be feeling.”

Use lots (and lots) of lube

Experts can't stress enough the importance of using plenty of lubricant. “The rectum doesn’t have its own self-lubricating ability," explains Sherry A. Ross, MD, author of She-ology: The Definitive Guide to Women’s Intimate Health. Period. Since water-based lubes tend to break down quicker and there’s no natural moisture in the rectum, it’s crucial to use a thicker, silicone-based lube so tearing doesn’t occur. Even tiny tears in the anal area can allow bacteria and viruses into your system, potentially leading to infection.

STDs are a real threat

Speaking of infection, anal sex can spread the same STDs you can pick up from vaginal sex. Except this time the infection is in your rectum, where your gyno won't know to test you. “People think you can’t get HPV, herpes, syphilis, and even hepatitis A and B," says Dr. Ross. "You can still get all those STDs from anal sex, which is why it’s important to stay protected." 

That means using lots of lubricant to prevent tearing, and always using a condom unless you know for sure (like really for sure) that your partner is STD-free. And it bears repeating: Anal sex is the riskiest type of sex when it comes to transmitting HIV, according to the CDC. 

Your bowels could be affected

"This question gets asked the most: will I poop everywhere?" says Dr. Ross, adding that it's hard to give an answer, since it depends on so many factors, including when you last went number two. But in general, anal sex could put added stress on the anal sphincter muscle, and that could "prevent you from having a bowel movement on your own terms or a normal consistency to your bowel movements,” she adds. To reduce the likelihood of this happening, go slow, hit the bathroom first, and ask your partner not to go too deep.

It's not weird to actually enjoy it

One of the most toxic myths about anal sex is that it makes you a "dirty" person, says Dr. Ross. “We’re moving into another phase of expression that this can just be part of the normal sexual experience; it doesn’t have to have this horrible taboo attached to it,” she says. If you find that you like it, don’t get caught up in the outdated stigma or what other people think. The rules about how women are expressing themselves in the bedroom have and willkeep evolving.

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